Category Archives: Life

Thank you, Chester!

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I wrote this post a few years ago, and with the death of Chester Bennington, I thought I should share it again. It’s from one of my older blogs, but this was one of the best times I’ve had with my son:

My son is a huge fan of Linkin Park. This happened because of the song they did for Transformers. My kids have grown up listening to music that my wife and I listen to. This can run from Nine Inch Nails(my favorite band) to Lacuna Coil(My wife’s favorite band) or any number of classical musician’s that I may listen to while writing. They have had an eclectic mix of music in their ears from birth until now. Right now I am listening to Staind while doing my revisions. So when our son became more interested in the band than just liking the song from Transformers and wanted to listen to other albums from the band we indulged him. After listening to the albums he wanted to see them in concert. Many parents would have a problem with taking a then 4-year-old to see a rock band. I told him that once he was a little older I would take him to see them when they came to our city (Las Vegas). He said okay and then my wife forgot about it, I did not.

Linkin Park came out with their new album, “A Thousand Suns” in 2010. It is their best album since Hybrid Theory imo. I waited for them to announce a tour date for Las Vegas, tickets went on sale in December. After talking my wife into it; it didn’t take much talking, I planned for the date and asked him where he would like to go for dinner. After that was set, I thought that I might be one of the few dads to take his six-year-old to a rock concert. My first concert was Ratt and Bon Jovi in the 80’s, I think I was eight and it was not my choice to see the bands.

The week leading up to the Linkin Park concert one of the lead singers became sick. I was worried that my son would not be able to see his favorite band, and sent a get well message on the band’s website. Two day’s before the concert word came that the singer (Chester Bennington) was feeling better and it was much more than just the flu. The post on the band’s website said it was more serious, follow the link to learn more.

The night of the concert we left the house, not without my wife taking a picture of us first. After dinner we arrived at the venue a little later than I planned. The opening band “The Prodigy” was in the middle of their set. They were awesome, I had wanted to see Prodigy for a long time and got my chance. After Prodigy we went to get drinks and returned to our seats in anticipation of Linkin Park, my son sat on the edge of his seat until they started.

Watching his eyes light up hearing the songs on the radio/computer/or CD was nothing compared to the look he had hearing them live. Watching him sing along to Chester and Mike was one of the best moments I have had as a parent. Today I took him to Guitar Center to see about lessons. I had put it off until he saw the concert. If he still wanted to after the show I told him I would get him lessons, today I followed through. He will begin lessons in the next few weeks. I had more fun watching him than I did watching the band. He knew nearly every lyric and sang along. I look forward to many more concerts with him in the future.

Bri

*Update – It has been almost a year since this concert. He still love Linkin Park. We couldn’t make their show at The Joint for money reasons, but we’re going next time they come to Vegas.

He has been playing for almost a year now and loves playing just not practicing. He has private instruction once a week for thirty minutes and love his instructor.

This is still my favorite moment as a parent!

 

Don’t let the Quitters stop you.

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As an artist, writer, actor or entrepreneur, you will run into people who quit.

You will meet people who stopped following their dreams for one reason or another. They may have gotten married, had a kid and stopped believing.

As one of the people I listed, the quitters will see you working, see you grinding and hustling to reach the next mountain and they’ll become jealous.

They may do everything to stop you, they won’t support you because they don’t believe anymore.

They stopped believing in fairy tales when whatever circumstance stole their dream.

You’ll watch them going about their lives, dying on the inside because they see you working, their jealousy flares up and they’ll try to find a way to stop you.

Don’t let them.

Keep working, keep grinding and keep hustling.

No matter what happens, don’t stop working. You may have written a book, it’s sitting on your nightstand, your computer or you have an audition for a part, and they scoff at your dreams.

Stand up, go to that audition, finish that book, talk to the owner of the gallery that shows your type of artwork.

Never stop, never quit.

Failure should motivate you, the quitters should motivate you, the life you don’t have and life you want for you family, that should motivate you.

Never stop, never quit.

The voices in your head will always tell you that you can’t do it, the people, in reality, should be the least of your worries.

Ignore them, keep working, keep grinding and keep hustling.

 

Your insecurities are killing you.

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Each of us has those life moments where the doubt crushes you. It digs into your life, pulling the tendrils of happiness out and squashes them on the floor.

Then there are the moments where everyone is telling you that you can’t do what you’re trying to do. That you’re incapable of the greatness you see within yourself. 

These people are not trying to break some truth to you, they may be blood but they’re not family

These moments are the insecurities you see within yourself, these doubts of who you truly are, these moments are the basis for crawling out of the pit you find yourself in. Their words should motivate you more than anything else. They should push you to where you need to go.

When these people, these moments and those doubts creep up, go to another room because no one knows you like you know you. No one can understand your dreams like you.

You must keep up with the standards you set for yourself, you must push yourself to another level, you cannot stop, you must not stop if for nothing else than to prove the doubts, the insecurities, and these people wrong.

Don’t accept anything other than the life you want and deserve.

Move Forward

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There’s a point in life when you’re tired of the bullshit, tired of talking about what’s happened and you must step forward and move on.

You must forgive, you must remember what got you to where you, are and find a new way forward.

It’s when this happens that freedom comes. It’s this moment that you’re available to get your head out of your ass

It’s this moment that you’re available to get your head out of your ass. You’ll stop and get past the bullshit, you’ll stop, look in the mirror and stare at the person you’ve become and then you can understand the truth of how you got to your current situation.

Hold on to this moment, write it down, work through it and do what is required to move on.

Your writing will push you forward, you must listen to it. You must listen to your heart and the breath coming from your lungs.

The voice inside is no longer a viable concept. If you listen to the voice in your head you’ll falter, you’ll fail and become on of those who gives up.

Don’t give up, it leads to misery. Misery leads to finality and you’ll never dig yourself out.

Get through it, put your head down, get the words out that you need.

If you push through to the other side you will thank yourself later.

Move forward, always…

Transcendental Meditation after 3 years.

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I posted this on Medium last month and somehow forgot to post it here.

Three years ago I stood on the ledge of the parking garage where I used to work.

I’d been fighting depression since I saw my father at my grandfather’s funeral. He walked past me as if I weren’t there.

The day I stood on the ledge, a co-worker told me, “No one really cares about you or your bullshit.”

That was my end point. I got through with work, set my things in my car and walked to the ledge.

I saw the back of the hotel, the marquee for the hotel and the rooftop of the casino. A slight wind blew my hair and I remember putting my hands out at as if I could catch it.

I don’t remember how long I stood up there, it could have been five minutes, ten, or two, but I stepped off the ledge and sat in my car and cried for a long time.

I knew I was broken at that point and I had no idea how to put my pieces back together.

I called my wife, the emotion clearly audible as she asked, “what’s the matter?”

I told her, “I need help. I think I’m going to look into that Transcendental Meditation(TM) I’ve been reading about.”

“Whatever you need to do, I’m here.” She said and I drove home, but I don’t remember the drive, I don’t remember the next week. I only remember calling the TM teacher in Las Vegas and scheduling to come in for my introduction.

A week later, I started my practice.

It’s been three years since I started TM and here’s a list of things that have happened that I know wouldn’t have without TM:

  1. I quit a good paying job to write full time.
  2. We moved our kids out an environment that wouldn’t help them grow.
  3. I started writing full time.

I never would’ve had the courage or mental strength to leave my job had I not learned TM. I was a weak person, most of the people around me would attest to that.

I didn’t know what I wanted and I hated not seeing my kids.

Today, I write full time and I’m working on a book that I’ll be submitting in June. I bartend a few times a week, I see my kids more often and I’m able to spend time with my wife.

I know without TM I wouldn’t be alive today.

I still get bouts of depression. I don’t think about suicide as often as I once did and I’m less angry than I was three years ago.

If you’re having trouble, please call the Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1–800–273–8255.

If you’re interested in learning more about Transcendental Meditation try TM.org.

Today, my wife and I are both practicing TM and we’re planning on getting our kids taught as well.

Have a great rest of your week.