Tag Archives: Family

How TM Allows You to Take Control of Your Life.

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I’m four months on with TM and the main thing I’ve noticed is my ability to recognize myself.

Before TM I didn’t know who I was, what I wanted or whether I wanted anything, this includes to continue living.

I was in the darkest place I’ve ever been in my life, and that scared me enough to try something which some people I know saw as radical, Transcendental Meditation.

I’ve missed a couple of times, mostly because of conflicts with timing, airplane trips and being tired as hell.

Those times were when I noticed a difference, I’m not saying to stop doing it to see what I’m talking about, but I could tell the difference in my temperament and overall mood.

With TM I discovered who I am, what I want and where I want my life to be in a few years.

Before I was under the delusion that I could get myself out of any funk I got into, this includes depression, but I was wrong. My depression was the worst I’ve dealt with and because of that, I had to try TM.

In my first session I learned more about myself in those 20 minutes, than I had in the previous 38 years.

I found peace, for the first time in my life I felt like I could make myself better than I’d been before.

Along the way I’ve learned that focusing on myself, my writing and my family were more important than any distraction caused by my day job.

The delusions I had about my life before TM have been put into perspective as I didn’t know who I was or in what direction I was headed.

The delusion of our life is that it gets better without help, it rarely does.

I discovered my life is more than the person in the body, it’s about the way I want to help others, the things I want to teach others, like TM, and how I want those I care about to discover TM and its benefits.

TM has changed my views on life, family and creativity, but I know I’m on the correct path now, and that’s changed how I run my life instead of it running me.

TM allows you to take control of your life in a way you never thought possible.

 

Liking the Creature in the Mirror.

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Our lives, and our journey through our life finds us looking for where to turn, where to run and where we should be. This journey is oftentimes hard, but we go through it, our head in our hands, tears rolling down or a smile on our face, but it’s our decision which it is.

Going through the journey, we’re looking for something to grasp, something which attracts us and there are times which that something, which initially attracts, repels.

The act of being repelled by the journey sends us reeling and we have to get back up, stand on our feet and look in the mirror at the creature we’ve created.

The creature, though not who we wanted to be at the start of the journey, tells us who we are at that moment, and only at that moment.

The moment we get past that creature and on to another, we discover that we’re something better, not the creature in the mirror anymore, but the person we wanted to be all along.

The person we’ve become is a monster of different parts, taken from different aspects of who we are, who we’ve been and where we hope to be.

The person in the mirror is no longer one we don’t want to look at, it’s the one we take pride in, the one we tell our friends about and that person is the one we hoped to be at the beginning of our journey.

The journey is long, the road is filled with more bumps and divots than a 60-year-old freeway. We find ourselves going through new things each day, but at the end, when we look in the mirror at the creature staring back, is it the one you want to be, or the one you wish wasn’t there?

The creature is only where we are at that point, it changes, it moves and at the finality of the journey the creature becomes who we hoped to be.

Finding Peace with the Angry Eight-Year-Old

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When I was eight years old my parents separated and eventually divorced.

I dealt with it like and 8-year-old would, I pushed the anger at my parents deep down inside.

I hid how angry I was–with random acts of rage and frustration–from everyone.

It wasn’t until I was older that I began to understand my anger, but I’d never truly had it under control, it would just be pushed down and ignored until it blew.

When it blew, watch out.

The first time my then girlfriend, and now wife, saw it for the first time, she didn’t no how to respond, it scared her, not because the anger was directed at her, but because she didn’t know how someone who seemed so calm could explode in that manner.

The anger at my parents for how they acted towards us after they separated didn’t help things. I was only eight and only knew my dad was kissing some other woman and my mom another man, nothing was ever explained to me.

When my son turned eight and my wife and I were still together, I felt like I’d conquered a childhood demon, a minor one, but still a demon.

Their divorce was a catalyst in my life. One of those moments where life changed, and I changed.

Before eight-years-old, I stood up to people who’d bullied my sisters and got good grades, afterward I was the one bullied and I no longer cared about my grades. Both of these had an effect on the relationship I had with my parents, something which I don’t think they understood then, though I believe my mom understands now.

It’s been 30 years since then, and I’m going through another catalyst, this time a different better one.

After pushing my anger down, I’ve begun to deal with the eight-year-old I was, and we’ve been talking about how things can move forward with who we are, and not be the angry little boy.

This began with TM.

My break earlier this year was 30 years in the making and though I cried more than I screamed on that day, I’ve come to understand myself better with TM. I’ve learned that my parents didn’t know what the hell they were doing and that though they were young and didn’t seem to care about me at eight, they do now.

With TM I’ve learned that the angry eight-year-old is part of who I am, and that journey has come to an end in the calmness I feel with TM.

I know that I can’t get back the 30 years I lost to anger, but I can live in peace with the person I am now, and I have Transcendental Meditation to thank for that.

I’m a better person than I was five months ago when I wanted to kill myself, and I know that my life is finally hit another road, which I’m following faithfully, keeping my head on the things I want to accomplish in my life and that, in the end Peace is better than being an angry eight-year-old.

Doing the Right Thing

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Each of us want to do something which changes the world around us, but the problem we have is finding the opportunity or the means to do it.

We want to do this for on simple reason, because it’s right.

What’s right hasn’t always been my best play. I’d usually sit on the sidelines, watching everything play out. But, and this is a big one, I never thought I had anything to contribute to the world.

Sure I have two kids, but they’re carrying on as people who will eventually, like the rest of us, not be here.

I wanted to give back in a way which would others, not for glory, but because it’s what is right.

The right thing often escapes us.

We find it lying in the corner, its body thrashed and battered, but we want to be right, we want to do good for the sake of helping others.

That’s why creativity is important in the world.

There are tons of doctors, lawyers, but the creatives are shunned until they can produce something worthwhile.

Writers room are full rejection slips. Some of us hold onto them as a badge of honor.

We look at them as we finish our current project and hope, “Maybe this is the one.”

Then we send it off, hoping.

Doing right is something which will sustain us, keep us safe and hopefully help our writing.

I write to help others, which seems to be working lately if you’ve found this blog from TM.org.

Helping others is what we should do, because it’s the right thing

Finding Your Own Road.

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The road follows its own course, we’re just along for the ride.

We stare at the road presented before us, its trees, thorns ad cracked and splintered surface, but what we rarely see are the wildflowers growing in the ditch on the side of the road.

The wildflowers, though beautiful, are hidden from view. They’re rarely seen and seldom talked about, but the cracked and splintered surface is discussed often.

Our roads lead only where we want them to. The only thing we can do is get off the highway, find a gas station, and ask for directions, but we don’t like directions, or at least not a lot of us.

Our direction, whether going through a big city, or a small town, always leads us through cracks and thorns, but once we reach the city, do we stop and look for beautiful areas, no, we’re resigned to believe there are none.

Cities are beautiful, but we often forget about the architecture around us unless we’re standing in it.

Towns don’t have the rush of the city, but they have the problems, and once we’re entangled in those problems they become bigger than the city.

A stop in the towns is wonderful for some people, as are cities, but getting beyond those and discovering what lies beyond the city gates or the township’s borders, that’s when you discover the correct road.

Stay on the road, follow the course and let it take you where you need to be.