I missed last week and this week isn’t promising either.
New project, a lot of bartending gigs and trying to spend time with the kids before school starts up next month.
We’re planning for Wizarding World next summer with the kids after school gets out all while I’m scheduling the publishing of 3 books.
A busy year, but well worth the effort.
Have a good week.
Each of us has one thing that defines us; one ability, one talent, and it is that one thing we must chase.
With that chase, there is a far off dream or goal.
Other things come along to challenge how much you want that goal. These things may help you achieve the goals laid out, but more often than not, they’re a distraction.
They’re trying to move you away from your goals, from your dreams and they will kill your motivation.
Others in your life may think they’re good things, they may try to convince you of that. They may believe they are, but they don’t know you as well as you know you.
No one knows your goals, no one knows your dreams like you do, NO ONE!
Your life has always been yours to live, yours to screw up, and yours to chase those dreams with.
You only have one life, make it worth the effort and never let anyone tell you who you are or what your dreams are.
What are you chasing?
Every couple of months I look for a new motivation book. I learn what those I’m following on social media are reading or listening to or I look for something from one of my favorite inspirational authors.
This past week, while looking through my social media, I found that Ryan Holiday had a book out that I hadn’t listened to.
I’ve listened to Ego is the Enemy two or three times but the title for this one grabbed me.
The Obstacle is the Way made me look at my writing differently, my relationship with my wife and kids differently and I had to reevaluate where my focus laid.
My obstacle has been writing a coherent story and publishing it, neither of those has happened.
I discovered the obstacle was the way I was writing the stories not the stories themselves.
It was a breakthrough and I’m still wrapping my head around it.
It isn’t the writing it’s the way I’ve been constructing or not constructing the story.
I’ve always seen myself as a pantser but after finding my obstacle I worked for 5 days on an outline.
I started the story Monday and yesterday I put out more words than I ever have while using an outline.
I know where the story goes and how to get there.
I’ve changed the obstacle and made it work for me.
Now, I’ve read a lot of books on writing but never paid much attention to them until now.
The book I used to get the outline is called The Anatomy of Story by John Truby.
This book was gifted to me from my cousin who is a published author, I should have listened to her.
I’m stubborn and want to do things myself but I now know the way.
I feel more positive about the direction of my writing because of Ryan’s book and I understand how to craft the story better.
The smallest obstacle can cause the biggest headaches, I’ve written five long-form stories, 4 novels, and 1 novella, but none of them have felt as solid as the one I’ve barely started, I thank a few things, growing up as a writer, discovering that I needed an outline and learning that the obstacle in the way was mostly my ego telling me I didn’t need an outline.
Each of us has those life moments where the doubt crushes you. It digs into your life, pulling the tendrils of happiness out and squashes them on the floor.
Then there are the moments where everyone is telling you that you can’t do what you’re trying to do. That you’re incapable of the greatness you see within yourself.
These people are not trying to break some truth to you, they may be blood but they’re not family
These moments are the insecurities you see within yourself, these doubts of who you truly are, these moments are the basis for crawling out of the pit you find yourself in. Their words should motivate you more than anything else. They should push you to where you need to go.
When these people, these moments and those doubts creep up, go to another room because no one knows you like you know you. No one can understand your dreams like you.
You must keep up with the standards you set for yourself, you must push yourself to another level, you cannot stop, you must not stop if for nothing else than to prove the doubts, the insecurities, and these people wrong.
Don’t accept anything other than the life you want and deserve.
With Monday’s post, I’ve been thinking about the way I’ve been writing.
To all of those, the answer is no, I haven’t worked hard enough, I haven’t done what I need to do. I haven’t worked on the parts of the craft that I fail at.
There is a big reason for that, laziness and fear.
I’ve been lazy. I’ve watched too much tv, I haven’t stayed up late when I told myself I would. I’ve let myself down
I’ve watched too much tv, I haven’t stayed up late when I told myself I would.
I’ve let myself down.
In the process of letting myself down, I’ve let my family down. I haven’t worked hard enough because I got too comfortable. I was too used to my life the way it was.
I didn’t want to work harder because I was worried I wouldn’t be able to spend time with my kids or my wife.
Along the way to this realization, I forgot to accept who I was. I forgot to take ownership of what I wanted to do and put forth the effort to do it.
I didn’t want to work harder because I was comfortable.
I’ve known for a while that I need to work harder. I’ve looked at my writing and realized I need to improve my craft but I haven’t, not until this past few weeks.
Each of us will hit that point.
We’ll hit the point where we’re looking at ourselves in the mirror and we have to ask that person, what are you doing? Why aren’t you working hard enough? What the hell are you afraid of?
We have to answer those questions honestly if not, we’re truly lying to ourselves.
Brian B Baker, Writer 