Stop caring about other’s perceptions.

Over the last year there have been more moments where I felt alone in my process and journey.

Where, other than my wife and one or two others, I didn’t feel there was the support I thought I’d get.

Those moments grew throughout the year. They led to decisions in my writing as well as in my social media activity.

As a writer working towards publishing, especially in the past year, I felt it was time to address this.

I went off of Facebook a year ago. Have taken breaks from Instagram and Twitter, as well as this blog.

I learned a lot from those breaks. One of things is, there are a core group of people who want me to succeed in writing, then there are those who don’t care.

A few years ago, this would have hurt like hell. Today, it burns a little, but that’s all. Those who don’t support my writing are not necessary for me to write. Nor are they necessary to my every day life.

It may sound like a rant, which I don’t do often, but maybe it is. I’ve reached a point as a writer where approval isn’t necessary for my mental health , that’s good right?

The last few days I’ve been writing something different and it’s been hard. It goes against a lot of who I am. It’s also a great story idea. When we, as writers and humans, reach a point where the approval of others is no longer necessary. That’s when we’ll stop caring what people think about us. It’s freeing and scary.

Today, I put some words on the page on this story. I’m not sure what I’ll do with it once it’s done, but its fun as hell.

Hope you’re having a good Tuesday. Make sure to take care of yourself today and I’ll see you on Thursday.

Happy Writing!

Rabbit Holes, Monsters and Finding Things In Dark Places.

For a long time I’ve thought about who I am, what I want and whether I have the balls to go and get it.

In those moments, thinking about who I am, I thought about the person hidden inside. The monster, because honestly we all have a little monster inside. It’s the thing that keeps us going when the darkness creeps in.

What I want, well, that’s something else. I want what my life deserves, and often that’s in conflict with the perception of who I am, to others I’m perceived as this nice guy, but the monster, well, he’s not happy about that.

There are moments of dissociation, not complete, but enough to know there’s something else…the rabbit hole gets bigger, but it’s also great fun to be the monster, he gets more done, he lets me feel the way I want, and sometimes, though not often, I see the world as it really is, beautiful, with glancing shadows in the brightest spots and chasms of light within the most beautiful of creatures.

The rabbit hole never eats the monster, but the monster is seen licking his lips from the edge, waiting for an emergence.

Who we are isn’t defined by perception, it’s defined by who we want to be, and honestly, isn’t that what really matters?